striking a balance

[LOXVODKA <LOXVODKA...>]

LOX & VODKA
Widely Acclaimed
Klezmer, Jewish & American music group
202/966-7270
http://www.LoxVodka.com

I am always struck by the intensity to which we react to kol isha.  It is a 
law that hits a raw nerve for so many people on both sides of the issue.  
While I too have very strong feelings about it, I have even stronger feelings 
about how divisive this has become in our community.  There is enough that 
divides us in this world.  I would like to see what we could contribute to 
helping strike a balance.

It is indeed difficult to find comparitive reactions to other Jewish laws.  
Kashrut is easy to address since it is not difficult to be sure a Jewish 
communal event serves  only kosher food.  Doing so does not exclude anyone 
who wants to attend and, while everyone may not like the food, it certainly 
would not keep someone from showing up.  In this case, it is easy to strike a 
balance.  It occurs to me that we need to be able to find a way to strike a 
balance regarding kol isha, which is clearly a much more difficult thing to 
do.  

In the past, community events have bent over backwards to meet the needs of 
its most observant attendees such as through kashrut, men covering their 
heads and even, on occasion, requirements regarding what is appropriate 
attire.  In most ways, this effort to bend over backwards is filled with 
kavod, respect and honor making it, as my mother always told me, the right 
thing to do.  It becomes more difficult when that right thing to do involves 
excluding people.  While I do not believe it is our job as musicians or as 
Jews to "change" how the orthodox interpret the laws, I do believe it is 
incumbant upon us to help the community find constructive ways to address 
this conflict.

Lox & Vodka has performed at non-orthodox, private functions where orthodox 
Jews would be present.  The food was kosher and the men covered their heads.  
We have been asked to hold off with any female vocals or music that would 
encourage mixed dancing until a certain point in the program when the client 
felt that anyone uncomfortable with these things could comfortably leave.

Perhaps we could help planners of Jewish community events, who desire to 
reach out to everyone in the community, see that they can do so by designing 
an event that would include female vocals in the later portion of the 
program.  In this way, anyone uncomfortable hearing it will have had the 
opportunity to participate in the event and not feel uncomfortable, or as 
uncomfortable, about leaving a little early.  At the same time, female 
vocalists are able to participate in a community event without offending 
anyone.

While this may not be the answer for every public Jewish function, how 
wonderful it would be if we, the keepers and distributors of Jewish music, 
could be part of creating solutions which can strike that much needed 
balance.  Isn't that so much of what music is all about?!