RE: A nice surprise?

[Reyzl Kalifowicz-Waletzky <reyzl...>]

My survivor parents also belonged to a traditional synagogue - officially 
Conservative, but with an Orthodox service.  It was a congregation of 
Holocaust survivors with mostly Yiddish dialogue and where they strove to 
do everything "like it was at home".   Everything but the seating, that is. 
  There were 3 sections in the synagogue.  At the very front, there were 
perpendicular rows with shomer-shabes women sitting on one side and 
shomer-shabes men sitting facing them on the other side.   Each of these 2 
groupings felt totally connected to the goings on, because between them was 
the shtender (=the table upon which the Torah is places and the cantor 
prays).  In the middle of the synagogue, there was a section of horizontal 
rows of men sitting on one side and women sitting on the other, with a 
small mekhitsa between them.   Toward the back, there was mixed sitting and 
where my mother liked to sit.  My father, a shul regular, sat with his male 
buddies, but sometimes moved to the mixed section to sit with my husband 
and I when we came to his shul.  With all these choices, everybody was 
happy.  We ourselves belong for many, many years to an egalitarian 
Conservative synagogue that is traditional in every sense.  Families sit 
together which is what I like.  Until 2 years ago, we had a woman rabbi for 
7 years.

>The first woman to be called up was our oldest woman, Mrs. Dick, who had 
been a >member for over 30 years, since she came here from Argentina.  We 
were so proud, >but you should have seen her face beaming.

How wonderful!  I can see her very well.  Someone should write this up and 
send it everywhere so that everyone knows how wonderful and proud women 
feel about participating.
People should know that such synagogues exist.

I myself really had no questions about your shul.  Once I read how the 
husbands beamed when the wives were on the beam, nothing else had to be 
said.  That is how it should be.


Reyzl


----------
From:  Lori Cahan-Simon [SMTP:l_cahan (at) staff(dot)chuh(dot)org]
Sent:  Tuesday, May 01, 2001 6:17 PM
To:  World music from a Jewish slant
Subject:  A nice surprise?

Tayere Reyzl,

Thanks for your view to our list.  I thought you'd like to know about
our little shul.  We used to be a Modern Orthodox congregation, begun
in the 1930s or 40s by the highly respected Rabbi Genuth, z"l, who
started it with the thought that there were those who wished to be
Orthodox but not live with a mekhitsa, amongst other things.  I will
never forget the summer when we voted to allow women to come up to the
bima for aliyot, etc.  The first woman to be called up was our oldest
woman, Mrs. Dick, who had been a member for over 30 years, since she
came here from Argentina.  We were so proud, but you should have seen
her face beaming.  There were women and men who chose to sit on
opposite sides of the shul and those who chose to sit together.
Totally anyone's choice, with no looks or comments from anybody.  That's
the way the shul was set up.

When I joined, about 6 years ago, I was just about the youngest person
there and my Nathan was an infant, usually the only child there.  He
had a whole shul full of grandparents to spoil him!  We existed as such
until about 3 years ago when we finally could not get a minyan every
week.  We had assets but no congregation, so started "dating" a group
of people, who did not want to move east with the rest of their
Conservative shul (Rabbi Michael Hecht) and build a new building where
they would have to drive to or move to a new home.  They had a
congregation, but no assets.  We sold our building and are banking our
assets to buy a building at some point.  Meanwhile we are saving alot
by paying minimal rent to someone else.  We felt we were compatible and
got "married".

We use our Orthodox prayerbooks and have our Orthodox rabbi (Moshe Adler
is wonderful, gentle, generous, learned) and women are an important part
of our shul, but no one notices, really.  It's just a natural thing to
all of us.  We just all do what we need to do.  It is a lot of work to
keep it going, but well worth it.  The people are wonderful, interesting
humans.  Some of our congregants are teachers at the Cleveland College
of Jewish Studies.  We have children's services and learner's services
twice a month, so that people who don't know or understand some aspect
of the service have a chance to learn more and be comfortable.  Our
members come to us with all level of knowledge, but the hallmark is that
all of us are constantly striving to know more.  We sponsor many
learning opportunities and bring in speakers (lovely "lunch 'n' learns"
after shul on Shabbes) and help to sponsor other local learning
events.  I love my shul and am proud to be in it.  We call ourselves
"Traditional Egalitarian" and we truly are.  We have about 90 families
now and there is such a heymish feel, it is a pleasure to come and feel
all the welcoming smiles from all.  One aspect I love is that there are
so many children, our future.

Just thought you'd like to know our history.

Mit frayndshaft,
Lorele


Reyzl Kalifowicz-Waletzky wrote:

> Robert,
>
> Your comments are most unfair and very disappointing.  They are also
> insulting to everyone here, not just Shirona.  Anyone walking into
this
> extremely rare situation - an egalitarian Orthodox congregation - an
> oxymoron if there ever was one, would be watching the men to see if
they
> are uncomfortable.  One would want to know:
>
> if the men felt imposed upon by flaming feminists who somehow got
control
> because they were the majority;
> if the men felt imposed upon by a rebellious, self-destructive rabbi;
> if they were angry because power has been usurped from them;
> if they felt guilty about abandoning halakha;
> if they felt guilty about being ostracised by the rest of the Orthodox

> world;
> if they were regretful about such radical move, etc., etc.
>
> I have never even heard of such a synagogue existing anywhere in the
world
> and I do follow these things.  I only know of a small (20-30 people)
> Brooklyn egalitarian havurah which is mostly Orthodox, and I imagine
that
> there are other havuroth around the country who are egalitarian
Orthodox.
>   But a havurah is not an official synagogue congregation with a
building
> and a sisterhood.  If this Rabbi Moshe Adler is the same Rabbi Moshe
Adler,
> formerly of Los Angeles and husband of feminist theologian Rachel
Adler,
> then I understand how such a thing came about.
>
> But Shirona does not deserve your comments.  Neither would any other
> reporter, male or female, describing such a rare experience.
Actually,
> this report told us that it's meshiakh's tsaytn [=time of the
mashiakh].
>
> Now, this is totally an aside comment.  I have been too busy with my
sick
> knee and physical therapy to get to this.
> I went on the web and listened to Shirona singing a few weeks ago and
found
> her truly, truly wonderful.  I am usually disappointed with current
> liturgical recordings, because it usually sounds so derivative, e.g.,
I see
> no reason to set a tfila today to '60's folk rock, or hip-hop, or pop
> gospel (unless one was trying to do an interfaith event).  But Shirona
was
> a most pleasant surprise.  What a lovely contribution to the Jewish
world
> and Jewish recordings!  A yasher koyakh across the board, Shirona.
Once I
> listened to you I really got mad at the people who cancelled out on
you.
>  It was totally their loss.  Too bad for the Orthodox brother in law
who
> didn't know what he was missing.
>
> Reyzl
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------
>
> >From: "Robert Cohen" <rlcm17 (at) hotmail(dot)com>
> >Reply-To: jewish-music (at) shamash(dot)org
> >To: World music from a Jewish slant <jewish-music (at) shamash(dot)org>
> >Subject: Re: A nice surprise?
> >Date: Sun, 29 Apr 2001 23:02:43
> >
> >>For me it was a spiritual and emotional experience - seeing "frum"
women
> >>taking an active and awe inspiring roll in the service, as equal to
men
> >>and
> >>equal before G-d.  (I was watching the men during the portions where

> women
> >>were leading, and they  seemed very comfortable. The husbands whose
wives
> >>were leading looked very proud.   It was all very natural...
> >
> >
> >I have much respect and regard for Moshe Adler and am very interested
to
> >hear that he's overseeing a traditional but egalitarian service.  I
would
> >automatically incline to assume that he's coming from a thoughtful
and
> >serious place in doing so.
> >
> >Having said that:  Between the lines-or, actually, *in* the lines-of
this
> >posting are flashing yellow lights indicating some of the potential
> >problems, perhaps, of such services.  *Why,* for example, was our
> >correspondent "watching the men during the portions where women were
> >leading"-or at any time, for that matter?  One of the reasons why
many
> >women that I've talked to about this, or whose thoughts I've read
about
> >from >other's writing and interviewing, *like* a separate space from
men
> is so >they *won't* be watched during davening-and I can't imagine
that
> the men >being watched here benefited from being watched-"spiritually
> and >emotionally," as our correspondent puts it.  Nor do I imagine
that
> the >women >at the service would have experienced a deeper kavannah in

> their davening >if >*they* were being watched.
> >
> >It's nice that the husbands of women leading the service "looked very

> >proud"-though, again, nobody should have been noticing-but that
suggests,
> >again, *less* focus and intensity in prayer (or contemplation, study,

> >etc.),
> >which is what a synagogue service should be about.  This service
comes
> off,
> >at least in this account, as more of a show-and-tell entertainment
> >production-that's where one is appropriately "proud" of one's
> >spouse's/children's/friend's home run, aria, etc.  Parents, etc.,
can't
> >help
> >but kvell over their children's bar/bat mitzvah-uncles too.  But that

> >should be the exception-and, indeed, in the synagogues, in my
experience,
> >where bar mitzvah is taken maximally seriously as a religious coming
of
> age
> >and not a pageant-with-party, even parents' kvelling is expressed in
a
> very
> >different way from at Little League.
> >
> >
> >>Later I spent a good half hour talking with the Rabbi,  Moshe
> >>Adler.  We should all be blessed with such Rabbis - open minded,
> >>spiritual,
> >>a man who is in touch with his own conscience - and has the guts to
act
> on
> >>his beliefs.  Even in the face of a hostile "peer environment".
> >
> >
> >I have, as I said, nothing but regard for Moshe Adler.  But Shirona
is,
> >sadly, again so wrapped up in self-righteousness that she imagines
that
> >only
> >those who agree with her are "in touch with [their] own conscience"
or
> >"[have] the guts to act on [their] beliefs."  It's a supremely
arrogant
> and
> >ugly notion-but Shirona seems incapable of recognizing that a rabbi
who
> >*doesn't* choose to go in this-i.e., her preferred-direction may be
just
> >as in touch with his conscience-and perhaps showing even more guts,
since
> >he has to defy, among other things, the limitless self-righteousness
of
> >some
> >(but not all) Jewish (and non-Jewish, for that matter) feminists.
> >
> >
> >I admire Rabbi Adler, among other reasons, because, in my limited
> >experience, he *doesn't* convey this kind of arrogant
> >self-righteousness-but, rather, an earnest humility (one of the
> >requirements of which is the knowledge and belief that one may be
wrong)
> in
> >seeking to hear what G*d wants of him at any given moment and to
serve G*d
> >as best he can.
> >
> >It's an example worth emulating.
> >
> >--Robert Cohen
> >
> >


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