Re: Absolutely Off Topic: Jewish Guide to Shoveling Snow

[Jordan Hirsch <trombaedu...>]

Holy Cow is this good!!!

Jordan


Lori M Simon wrote:

> Okay, so it's Jewish, it's musical, it's male and female, it's various
> Jewish viewpoints, appropriate to our recent discussions.  Enjoy!
>
> love,
> Lorele
>
> You can hear clips from Lori's CDs at:
> http://www.cdbaby.com/lcahan
> http://www.cdbaby.com/lcahan2
> http://www.cdbaby.com/nosband
> Email me for purchase or buy at CD Baby or Hatikvah Music at:
> http://www.hatikvahmusic.com
>
>  Jewish Guide to Shoveling Snow
>
> Ariel Sharon - "The important thing is to shovel the entire width and
> breadth of the driveway, regardless of what anyone else thinks."
>
> Ehud Barak - "You must shovel most of the driveway, but the exact
> dimensions of shoveling will be determined in discussions with our
> neighbors. No wait, you can shovel only in places where snow had
> previously fallen, but you cannot shovel in places where no snow had
> fallen - wait, don't do any shoveling until you hear from me!"
>
> Yossi Sarid - "You should not shovel any part of the driveway, since you
> really do not have any valid historical or legal claim to the driveway,
> and it will soon be given back to its rightful owners."
>
> Artscroll Hilchos Sheleg ("Laws Regarding! Snow; Ashkenaz version,
> chapter 5) - "First approach the snow with the proper kavanah, meditating
> on the concept of snow removal. Recite the "...Who commanded us
> concerning the shoveling of snow" benediction," then take three steps
> back, bend the knees slightly with feet together, then look at the snow,
> lift shovel and dig, turning right and then left, bend knees fully, take
> three steps forward and deposit snow deliberately. Repeat until done,
> then recite the Sheheheyanu benediction, go indoors and have a hot drink,
> remembering to say the
> Shehakol brocha (see Artscroll Hilchos on Drinking Hot Liquids)..."
>
> Tikkun Magazine - "What right do we have to violently take snow from its
> rightful resting place? Snow has rights: each snowflake is a unique
> individual, and we have absolutely no right to do anything with it. Let
> the snow decide for itself what it wishes to do, and then if it wishes to
> be shoveled, do so humanely."
>
> Rashi - "Snow, this is a form of solid precipitation that cling s to
> one's beard if you remain outside too long in the winter season. (Old
> French: neige). Shoveling is a Rabbinic precept, based on the verse in
> Isaiah 1:18 - "If your sins be like scarlet, they will turn as white as
> snows."
>
> Birthright Israel - "It does not matter how the shoveling is done, but
> the very act of a young Jew shoveling snow for ten consecutive days,
> under proper supervision will have a lifelong impact on Jewish identity."
>
> Meir Ben-Meir (Israeli Water Commissioner) - "Just shovel the snow as
> fast as you can, and ship it here. We are running out of water fast! Is
> anyone listening to me?"
>
> Judith Plaskow: Whether shoveling snow is an issue of concern to Jewish
> feminists, or feminist Jews, is a question we are not yet ready to ask.
> Who is to say that once we create a memory of Sinai that includes the
> voice of women, whether shoveling will even be the remedy for snow that
> we shall seek?
>
> E M Broner: The women sit in the snow and chant. They face East, knowing
> that the Holy of Holies was never theirs, yet knowing too that it always
> will be theirs. They become wet and cold, sitting in the snow, but as
> they imagine the Old Stone House in Jerusalem that contained heat and
> cold, gold and ash, darkness and light all at once and in the proper
> proportions, they felt neither wet nor cold. The women stand in a circle
> and sing. They grab shovels and as their voices rise and fall, the
> shovels rise and fall, and the piles of snow rise and fall, and then
> Shelegit the Lesbian for Places North says, "Enough with the rising and
> falling! It is too male! It is not mine!" The other women embrace her,
> sighing, except for the Bad Girl who likes the rising and the falling.
> She alone continues to shovel.
>
> Debbie Friedman:
> The snow blesses us/
> so we greet her flakes the snow purifies us/
> so we greet his strength/
> the snow is cold/so we seek what is warm/
> the snow is harsh/
> but we fear no harm.
>
> Marge Piercy:
> I am glad to know
> That snow is suddenly of my People,
> My People always knew snow, first in Michigan in gritty Detroit and
>  now in New England
> And I have written of snow in the many many many pages
> Of poetry and prose
> But when I started writing Jewish poems and prayers
>  about the sweet challah and the odd sounds of the Amidah
> Did I know
> That even snow
> Could be viewed through the lens of my People
> Part of our history
> Cold and wet and familiar as my cat's tongue?
>
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