[HANASHIR:11152] Re: Q about kids vs. kavanah

[H & R Shubert <notfranz...>]

I know this question is much bigger than just Bar/Bat Mitzvah services, but
here's something that works at our temple.  Parents  of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah
receive a handout from the rabbi at one of the several pre-BM/T family
information/discussion sessions, with information on decorum etc.  They are
also asked to make sure that there are two adults for every ten children in
each row of seats during the service.

Our family-oriented services are early (pre-dinner) Kabbalat Shabbat
services and they are no longer than 45 minutes.  There is generally much
less commotion since the kids are not strained beyond their limits. The
music that is chosen is close to the religious school music familiar to the
kids, which is generally lively.

At regular Friday night services, which in Montreal are the biggies, I have
found that the few children who are there are present with their families
and extremely well behaved.  I have heard more chatter from visiting teens
and adults who may have come to support the Bar/Bat Mitzvah child doing
his/her blessings prior to the big day.  However, compared to my experience
of some of the more traditional synagogues with gender-separate seating, our
services are very quiet and well-behaved.

Rachelle Shubert
Montreal


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