Halachos of Xmas

[Kober, Gary <Gkober...>]

OK,  I have appended a humorous piece (at least I found it so) at the
end on what Xmas would be like if it were a Jewish holiday, but I really
want to address this business of Jews playing Xtian music in Xtian
settings. Sorry for the somewhat misleading header, but I think those of
you who are pressing the delete button too quickly are missing out on
something important.

Alice wrote:

>I am getting really annoyed with the recent correspondences (e.g. Jews and
>Christians and Xmas music) on this list.  It is to the point where I am just
>deleting everything that comes from this network without opening it.  How
>about returning to our purpose of discussing Jewish music!!!

Alice, and others who object to this thread, the name of this discussion
list, at least as it appears on all the postings I receive, is "World
Music from a Jewish Slant". Bearing this in mind, and considering the
fact that most of the participants in this list are based  in
nominatively Xtian countries, I think it entirely relevant to be
discussing the broader social context in which we find ourselves. I
mean, I have a difficult time following some of the more arcane and
lengthy ethnomusicographical discussions on this list as regards
klezmer, about which I know zilch, but I'm trying to learn. Have a
little patience.

Recently, Adrian Durlester wrote:

>In any case, I am currently one of only three Jewish students at the
>Vanderbilt Divinity School. I have assisted as a pianist at chapel services,
>and participated in the choir. Throughout my life I have participated in
>performances of music set to parts of the Xtian liturgy. As a child, I
>probably knew the entire Latin High Mass better than any Hebrew.

>I used to just not sing the words Jesus and Christ. Now, I have a simple
>solution for words, courtesy of my wife: when I have to sing "Jesus" I sing
>"cheeses" and for Christ I sing "rice."

This sounds like the kind of self-protective tactic that my Jewish
friends and I used to employ in public  school during enforced singing
of Xtian hymns, e.g. "Onward Krishnan Soldiers", where we had a bit of a
laugh at the expense of two religions at the same time. It was actually
the only way as kids that we could deal with what we instinctively knew
was an incongruous situation for us. I could not imagine continuing to
do this as, in Wolf's words, "a conscious Jewish person". There is also
the concept of "maaris ayin", i.e. what others think you are doing, that
I'm sure you're aware of. Some of the Xtians who are observing you in
this context may think that you are lending credence to their beliefs,
or at least putting Xtianity on an equal footing with Judaism in the
marketplace of ideas, unless you have personally disclosed your beliefs
to every member of the choir or congregation. Or, maybe someone will
hear you singing "cheeses rice" and think you are trivializing their
faith.

>If I can use the gift of musical ability that G-d gave to me in service to
anyone's praise of >G-d, is that not being an or l-goyim by example?

I respect your intentions. However, what disturbs me about this
approach, at least from an halachic perspective (leaving aside for a
moment the very real objections raised by Wolf and Ingemar, insofar as
the history of organized Xtianity's institutionalized anti-Semitism is
concerned) is the following point: is the service you are refering to
"anyone's praise of G-d", or the praise of anyone's god? Assuming that
you were conversant with Indian music,  would you also participate in a
Hindu service, in the presence of sculptures of various gods and
goddesses, chanting praises to Shiva, Vishnu, etc. etc? Xtianity is no
different halachically for a Jew. There is a church, however, somewhere
in the southern USA, probably the only one of its kind, that has severed
all connections with Xtianity. They consider themselves Bnei Noach, and
have built their faith system on belief in one G-d and following the 7
Noachide laws. This would be, in my mind, a much more appropriate place
for you to help others praise G-d.   Anyway, I thought being an "or
l-goyim" refered more to one's ethical and behavioural standards, how
one treats  others on a day to day basis, etc. etc.


>When I do perform in a Xtian environment, what always strikes me is the
>alienness of it. It simply does not fit within my Jewish world view. So I do
>not fear corruption, proselytization, etc.

Do you not fear schizophrenia? I mean, how long can a person voluntarily
put him/herself into an alien environment without it having some kind of
effect?  Personally,  I performed professionally on the bar-club circuit
from the late 60's to early 80's. As I matured, got married and had
kids, I realized more and more that I just didn't want to be around the
smoking, drinking, sexual cavorting, and on occasion even brawling,
anymore. Becoming "frum" sealed it for me. For different reasons, the
bar scene did "not fit within my Jewish world view" either. Although I
loved (and  still love) the music, I could no longer stifle the feelings
of distaste I had for the environment in which I was performing it.

> If we want to stop being afraid of the Xtians, we need to interact with them
and make them >not fear us. . . Let them see who we are, that we don't
have horns or blood sacrifices..and >we stand a better chance of
getting along.

>I don't fear or feel threatened by what goes on inside a church. My Judaism
>is rock solid. What do you fear?

Who's afraid? I just don't get what you're trying to accomplish. I don't
go into bars anymore because I don't like the behaviour that goes on
there. I don't go into churches because there's no way I can be around a
prayer service that offers praises to Yashke. It has nothing to do with
being afraid of anybody,  with not being able to appreciate secular or
Xtian music, or regarding anyone as evil.

As for interacting with Xtians, both praticing and nominative, and
non-Jews of other faiths, or of no faith, there's plenty of opportunity
for this every day, outside of an overtly religious setting. I try not
to make any distinctions in my behaviour towards Jews as opposed to
non-Jews. I interact with non-Jews  professionally and socially ( I
didn't discard my non-Jewish friends after becoming frum) and there are
few problems. Even kashrus raises few eyebrows among non-Jewish
colleagues and friends these days (maybe, because I live in a large
multi-ethnic urban centre where everyone is a minority of some kind, it
makes for much greater exposure to people of different ethnic and
religious origins). Perhaps the nicest sign of respect is when my staff
tell me to hurry up during the winter or I'll be late for Shabbos (no,
they're not trying to get rid of me). In fact, since becoming frum I've
had more problems with the reactions of fellow Jews, which is often the
case.

>You know I believe that the Xtian community is co-opting our Jewish heritage,
and I resist >and resent that. But the answer is to be in their face
about it-and if that means being in
>their churches, so be it. It is not an endorsement of their past history.

>We have to learn to separate, to some degree, history and present reality. .
. we can learn >from our Xtian friends and fellow travelers on this
planet. We can attend a church service, >sing a brilliant setting of
Xtian liturgical text and still not be endorsing Xtianity as a
religion.

>And that might involve aiding in their celebrations, performing their
churches, etc.


I'm confused about why you are going to their churches - is it to
enlighten Xtians about who we are, in which case I think you may be
setting relations back since relatively few people like to have things
shoved in their face, even if you're claiming to be selling the "truth".
Please let us know what you are actually saying to them. Or is it to
help them sing praises to a false Messiah, which you don't endorse? As
for learning from our Xtian friends and fellow travelers, doesn't it say
in the Gemara that if someone tells you there is no wisdom amongst the
goyim, don't believe him? There's plenty we can learn from anybody
without participating in a church service.

Anyway Adrian, wouldn't your energy be better spent strengthening
Yiddishkeit (I'm not saying you're not doing that already) amongst Jews,
given the very discouraging trends in Jewish American society. Most of
us on the list, regardless of how we identify as Jews, are probably
involved in some aspect of Yiddishkeit on a day to day basis. I would
think that a vast number of American Jews are not.

>We should follow Jeremiah's advice to the exiles, and find a way to work
>within the larger society we find ourselves in.

>Adrian

That's what we've been doing for the last 2000 years. I'm no historian,
but it seems to me on a number of occasions that certain European
nations, which had previously exiled their Jewish populations, were keen
to have their descendants return, not out of any love for us, but
because we proved to be a boon to their societies. As a collectivity, we
have done tremendous things to build up just about every society in
which we have found ourselves, despite overwhelming odds.

Gary

OK, now I'll lighten up. A good Shabbos and freilichen Chanukah to all. 

                                                  HALACHOS OF XMAS

Have you ever wondered what Xmas would be like it if were a
Jewish
> >holiday?
> >
> >- ----------
> >:  LAWS OF XMAS  :
> >
> >I. PREPARING FOR XMAS
> >
> >1. PREPARATIONS FOR XMAS MUST NOT BEGIN(1) BEFORE THANKSGIVING.
(2)
> >THIS APPLIES TO PREPARATIONS WHICH AFFECT THE HOLIDAY MOOD,(3)
BUT
> >NOT THOSE WHICH ARE DONE IN PRIVATE.(4)
> >
> >(1) This contrasts sharply with Shabbos, for the mitzva of
honoring
> >Shabbos applies all week long. For example, if one finds a
> >particularly good food during the week, one should save it for
> >Shabbos even though it is now only Sunday and Shabbos is a week
> >away. However, Xmas preparations may not begin too far in advance,

> >in order to fulfill the dictum, "It's beginning to look a lot
like
> >Xmas." (2) This is because of the principle that two festive
> >occasions should not be mixed into each other. Note the decree of
> >the great R.H. Macy, who established that Santa Claus may not
> >appear in the Thanksgiving Day parade until after all the other
> >floats have passed. (3) Such as setting up the Xmas tree (some
say
> >even buying one,) or playing holiday music on the muzak. (4) Such
> >as buying gifts or buying the Xmas dinner turkey. Cooking the
> >turkey may not be done before Thanksgiving because it will appear
> >to be a Thanksgiving turkey.
> >
> >2. SOME HOLD THAT THE TREE SHOULD BE DECORATED IMMEDIATELY AFTER
> >THANKSGIVING,(5) BUT OTHERS PREFER TO DECORATE IT AS CLOSE TO
XMAS
> >AS POSSIBLE.(6)
> >
> >(5) For the mitzva of "adding to the yom tov" by beginning the
Xmas
> >season early. (6) As iN
> >THE AFTER XMAS SALE HAS BEEN SOLD. BAIS SHAMMAI IS STRICT AND
HOLDS
> >THAT XMAS IS OVER IMMEDIATELY AT THE CONCLUSION OF THE FOOTBALL
> >GAME.
> >
> >(40) Many are confused by the term "twelve days of Xmas",
implying
> >that the Xmas continues until and including January 5. Today,
this
> >view is accepted only by the Eastern Orthodox, who hold that
> >December 26 through January 5 constitute Chol Hamoed Xmas. This
> >view is opposed by both the Modern Orthodox and the Ultra
Orthodox
> >(and even the Non Orthodox) who hold that Xmas is only one day
> >long, and any context which seems otherwise actually refers to
the
> >Xmas *season*.
> >
> >2. WALLED CITES CONTINUE XMAS UNTIL THE END OF THE WINNING TEAM'S
> >TICKER-TAPE PARADE. A RECENT ACHARON, RABBI EDWARD, CELEBRATED
XMAS
> >IN AUGUST; FOR THIS HE BECAME KNOWN AS "CRAZY EDDIE".
> >
> >
> >- ----------
> >
> >X. HAGADA FOR XMAS
> >
> >
> >This is the fruitcake of our affliction, which our ancestors
baked
> >400 years ago. All who are in need, come and celebrate Xmas with
> >us. All who are hungry, come and partake of this 400-year-old
> >fruitcake, as it is written, "Let them eat cake!" This year we
> >watch football in the living room, next year may the Super Bowl
> >come to our city!
> >
> >Some have the minhag to place the gift-wrapped presents under the
> >tree so that they will pique the curiosity of the children so
that
> >they will ask the four essential questions:
> >     How come I have presents and Santa Claus didn't come yet?
Why
> >     do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway? How
much
> >     is that gorilla in the window? Why did the chicken cross the
> >     road?
> >
> >We were slaves to our employers, working seven days a week with
no
> >benefits, and then the unions were organized, and decreed a
> >five-day workweek and many holidays in the end of the year. Now
if
> >the unions had not gotten their act together, then we, and our
> >sons, and even our grandsons, would still have to work on Labor
> >Day, Thanksgiving, Xmas, and New Years. But our daughters and
> >granddaughters still await their salvation.
> >
> >There are four types of children who ask questions on Xmas: the
> >wise one, the bad one, the simple one, and the one who does not
> >know to ask.
> >    What does the wise one ask? I don't know; I couldn't
understand
> >    him
> >either.. Him you must send to a school for gifted children.
> >    What does the bad one ask? He says, "What is this holiday to
> >    you?"
> >Because he excludes himself from the community, you must exclude
> >him from your table, and he will go back to his employer and get
> >paid double-time and a half for working on Xmas day.
> >    What does the simple one ask? He simply asks, "What is this?"
> >    You will
> >say to him, "This is dinner."
> >     As for the one who does not know to ask, you must go to his
> >     room, wake
> >him up and say, "Next year, remember to come to the table!"
> >
> >If we would have a beautiful tree, but not have stockings hanging
> >from the fireplace, it would have been enough. If we would have
> >stockings hanging from the fireplace, but not get today off from
> >work, it would have been enough. If we would get today off from
> >work, and not get off on Erev Xmas as well, it would have been
> >enough. If we would get off on Erev Xmas as well, but not get
> >presents, it would have been enough. If we would get presents,
but
> >not a delicious dinner, it would have been enough. If we would
have
> >a delicious dinner and no dessert, it would have been enough. If
we
> >would have dessert, but not watch the football game, it would
have
> >been enough. If we would watch the football game, but not see our
> >team win, it would have been enough. If we would see our team win,

> >and have a hangover the next morning, it would have been enough.
> >
> >(Pick up the eggnog and say:) But we do have a beautiful tree,
and
> >we have stockings hanging from the fireplace, and we got today
off
> >from work, and we got off on Erev Xmas as well, and we got
> >presents, a delicious dinner, and dessert, and we watched the
> >football game, and saw our team win, and so we will now toast our
> >team, and pray that we do not get a hangover tomorrow morning:
"Yay
> >team!"
> >
> >Next year is Purim!
> >
> >
> >- ----------
> >
> >Zmiros
> >
> >Who knows one?
> >I know one!
> >One is a partridge in a pear tree.
> >
> >Who knows two?
> >I know two!
> >Two are the turtledoves, and
> >One is a partridge in a pear tree.
> >
> >Who knows three?
> >I know three!
> >Three are the french hens!
> >Two are the turtledoves, and
> >One is a partridge in a pear tree.
> >
> >Who knows four? I know four! Four are the calling birds! ...
> >Who knows five? I know five! Five are the gold rings! ...
> >Who knows six? I know six! Six are the geese a-laying! ...
> >Who knows seven? I know seven! Seven are the swans a-swimming! ...

> >Who knows eight? I know eight! Eight are the maids a-milking! ...
> >Who knows nine? I know nine! Nine are the drummers drumming! ...
> >Who knows ten? I know ten! Ten are the pipers piping! ... Who
knows
> >eleven! I know eleven! Eleven are the ladies dancing! ...
> >
> >Who knows twelve?
> >I know twelve!
> >Twelve are the lords a-leaping!
> >Eleven are the ladies dancing
> >Ten are the pipers piping
> >Nine are the drummers drumming
> >Eight are the maids a-milking
> >Seven are the swans a-swimming
> >Six are the geese a-laying
> >Five are the gold rings
> >Four are the calling birds
> >Three are the french hens
> >Two are the turtle doves and
> >One is a partridge in a pear tree.
> >
> >
> >- ----------
> >
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer,
> >My father bought for two zuzim.
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer.
> >
> >Then came a cat and ate the reindeer
> >My father bought for two zuzim.
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer.
> >
> >Then came a dog and bit the cat,
> >That ate the reindeer,
> >My father bought for two zuzim.
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer.
> >
> >Then came a stick and beat the dog,
> >That bit the cat that ate the reindeer
> >My father bought for two zuzim.
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer.
> >
> >Then came a fire and burned the stick, ...
> >Then came the water and quenched the fire, ...
> >Then came an ox and drank the water, ...
> >Then came a shochet and slaughtered the ox, ...
> >Then came the angel of death and killed the shochet, ...
> >
> >Then came the Blessed Holy One and slew the angel of death,
> >That killed the shochet that slaughtered the ox
> >That drank the water that quenched the fire
> >That burned the stick that beat the dog
> >That bit the cat that ate the reindeer
> >My father bought for two zuzim.
> >One little reindeer, one little reindeer.