RE: The tone of our discourse

[music <music...>]

A propos this year's kol isha go-round, which I think has included
many thoughtful contributions, Ari wrote, wisely I think:

But the most important thing that can come from going over this issue as 
seems appropriate would be finding ways to hear those who see the world 
differently. If we can reach a point where this issue can be discussed and 
heard by many currently-polarized sides, and responded to in a way that 
respects that hearing, then there is a chance that the good will and intent 
will be found to change, accomodate, or simply to understand. That would be 
a good thing.


I'd like to add that I *don't* think this goal is served by posts that question 
the 
rachmones or maturity of other posters; that refer to "flaming women off-list"--
which is both oxymoronic, as flaming is public by definition, and 
self-contradictory,
as it itself constitutes flaming; or call one who chooses to respond off-list a
"coward."

Actually, private rebuke may bespeak a tzniyus -- an inner reserve or modesty --
that is much prized in Jewish tradition; the unfelt need to rebuke publicly may
bespeak a *greater* maturity (obviously not shared by myself); and such private
rebuke of other women may also reflect an independence of thought -- let alone 
a feistiness of spirit -- on the part of the woman doing the rebuking.  

Isn't all that what any genuine or worthwhile feminism -- particularly a Jewish 
feminism -- ought to be about?

-- Robert Cohen, signing off


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