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[HANASHIR:6022] For your files
- From: Ellen Allard <ellen...>
- Subject: [HANASHIR:6022] For your files
- Date: Tue 16 May 2000 00.12 (GMT)
Dear All,
I know it's a bit late, or early depending on your point of view, but I
found this while cleaning out my email and thought you might want to put it
in your files for next Pesach. Hope you're all well and let me take this
opportunity to say how completely bummed out I am that I won't be attending
HN this year. But I'll be sending my good wishes and fondly remembering my
first HN last year. Hope those of you who are going have a wonderful time!
Regards,
Ellen Allard
Specializing in Music for Young Children
Ellen (at) PeterandEllen(dot)com
***********************
For our award-winning recordings, including
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"Sing it! Say it! Stamp it! Sway it! Vol. 2"
go to http://www.PeterandEllen.com
or call tollfree 1-888-746-4481
**********************
As Moses and the children of Israel were crossing the Red Sea, the children
of Israel began to complain to Moses of how thirsty they were
after walking so far. Unfortunately, they were not able to drink from the
walls of water on either side of them, as they were made up of salt-water.
Then, a fish from that wall of water told Moses that he and his family heard
the complaints of the people, but that they through their own gills could
remove the salt from the water and force it out of their mouths like a fresh
water fountain for the Israelites to drink from as they walked by. Moses
accepted this kindly fish's offer. But before the fish and his family began
to help, they told Moses they had a demand. They and their descendants had
to be always present at the seder meal that would be established to
commemorate the Exodus, since they had a part in the story. When Moses
agreed to this, he gave them their name which remains how they are known to
this very day, for he said to them, "Go Filter Fish!"
*******************************************************************
Last night I went to the Supermarket to buy matzoh and saw something new. It
was Bran Matzoh....On the box was written "Let My People Go."
*******************************************************************
A Passover Song [Sung to the tune of "These are a few of my favorite
things"]
Cleaning and cooking and so many dishes
Out with the hametz, no pasta, no knishes
Fish that's gefillted, horseradish that stings
These are a few of our Passover things.
Matzoh and karpas and chopped up haroset
Shankbones and Kiddish and Yiddish neuroses
Tante who kvetches and uncle who sings
These are a few of our Passover things.
Motzi and maror and trouble with Pharoahs
Famines and locusts and slaves with wheelbarrows
Matzoh balls floating and eggshell that cling
These are a few of our Passover things.
When the plagues strike
When the lice bite
When we're feeling sad
We simply remember our Passover things
And then we don't feel so bad.
*******************************************************************
Take Me Out To The Seder (To the tune of , of course, "Take Me Out to the
Ballgame!")
Take me out to the Seder
Take me out with the crowd.
Feed me on matzah and chicken legs,
I don't care for the hard-boiled eggs.
And its root, root, root for Elijah
That he will soon reappear.
And let's hope, hope, hope that we'll meet
Once again next year!
Take me out to the Seder
Take me out with the crowd.
Read the Haggadah
And don't skip a word.
Please hold your talking,
We want to be heard.
And lets, root, root, root for the leader
That he will finish his spiel
So we can nosh, nosh, nosh and by-gosh
Let's eat the meal!!!
*******************************************************************
The Eight Nights of Passover: (To the tune of 'The Twelve Days of Xmas)
On the first night of Passover my mother served to me
1) a matzo ball in chicken soup
2) two dipped herbs
3) three pieces of matzah
4) four cups of wine
5) five gefilte fish
6) six capons baking
7) seven eggs a boiling
8) eight briskets roasting
*******************************************************************
Paraoh doesn't Pay (To the tune of "I've been Working on the Railroad")
We've been working on these buildings;
Pharaoh doesn't pay.
We've been doing what he tells us
Mixing straw with clay.
Can't you hear the master calling,
"Hurry up, make that brick!"
Can't you feel the master whip us
'Til we're feeling sick.
Oy vay, it's a mess,
A terrible distress,
Oy vay, it's a mess for Jews, us Jews.
Moshe's in the palace with Pharaoh,
Warning of all God's clout, clout, clout.
Moshe's in the palace with Pharaoh,
And God's gonna get us out!
We're singing . . . .
Fee, Fi, Fiddely eye oh,
Make our matzahs "to go" oh oh oh.
Fee, Fi, Fiddely eye oh,
Stick it to the ol' Pharaoh!
*******************************************************************
Moses Island (Sung to the tune of Gilligan's Island)
Just recline right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of dreadful trip.
That started with ten awful plagues brought onto Egypt,
brought unto Egypt.
The boss he was a Jewish man raised as a Pharaohs son.
Then G-d he did come calling and soon the fun begun,
soon the fun begun.
More blood, such frogs, and all those bugs,
Pharaoh could just barely see.
The Jews were really scoring points and soon they would be free.
and soon they would be free.
They shlepped and shlepped for forty years across a desert land.
He went up to Mt Sinai and a party soon began,
a party soon began.
*******************************************************************
A Jewish man was waiting in line to be knighted by the Queen of
England. He was supposed to kneel and recite a sentence in Latin.
Comes his turn, he kneels, the Queen taps him on the shoulders
with the sword ... and in the panic of excitement he forgets the Latin
line. Thinking quickly, he recites the only other line he knows in a
foreign language which he remembers from the Passover Seder:
"Mah nishtana ha-lailah ha-zeh mi-kol ha-leilot." The puzzled
Queen turns to her adviser and asks, "Why is this knight different
from all other knights?"
*******************************************************************
The supply of ch'rain (horseradish used by many for bitter herbs
at the Pesach Seder) being off-loaded at the Madrid airport was
stopped by a freight handlers strike. It seems that the ch'rain in
Spain stayed mainly on the plane...
*******************************************************************
It seems a group of leading medical people have published data that
indicates that seder participants should NOT partake of both chopped
liver and charoses. It is indicated that this combination can lead to
Charoses of the Liver.
*******************************************************************
What do you call steaks ordered by 10 Jews?
Filet minyan.
*******************************************************************
If a doctor carries a black bag and a plumber carries a tool box, what
does a mohel carry?
A Bris-kit!
------------------------ hanashir (at) shamash(dot)org -----------------------+
- [HANASHIR:6022] For your files,
Ellen Allard