Popular songs adapted for the seder

[Bloom <bloom...>]

On the subject of popular songs rewritten to have Jewish subject matter: I
don't know who wrote these (they were forwarded to me by a friend), but
they're fun.


There's No Seder Like our Seder

(sung to the tune of "There's no Business like Show business")

There's no seder like our seder,

There's no seder I know.

Everything about it is halachic

Nothing that the Torah won't allow.

Listen how we read the whole Haggadah

It's all in Hebrew

'Cause we know how.

There's no Seder like our seder,

We tell a tale that is swell:

Moses took the people out into the heat

They baked the matzoh While on their feet

Now isn't that a story that just can't be beat?

Let's go on with the show!

>>>  >> >-----------------------------

Take Us Out of Egypt

(sung to the tune of Take me out to the ball game")

Take us out of Egpyt

Free us from slavery

Bake us some matzoh in a haste

Don't worry 'bout flavor--

Give no thought to taste.

Oi it's rush, rush, rush, to the Red Sea

If we don't cross it's a shame

For it's ten plagues,

Down and you're out

At the Pesach history game.



Elijah       (to the tune of "Maria")

Elijah!

I just saw the prophet Elijah.

And suddenly that name

Will never sound the same to me.

Elijah!

He came to our seder

Elijah!

He had his cup of wine,

But could not stay to dine

This year--

Elijah!

For your message all Jews are waiting:

That the time's come for peace

and not hating--

Elijah--

Next year we'll be waiting.

Elijah!

>>>  >> >---------------------------------------

Just a Tad of Charoset   (to the tune of "Just a spoon full of sugar")

Chorus:

Just a tad of charoset helps the bitter herbs go down,

The bitter herbs go down, the bitter herbs go down.

Just a tad of charoset helps the bitter herbs go down,

In the most disguising way.

Oh, back in Egypt long ago,

The Jews were slaves under Pharoh.

They sweat and toiled and labored through the day.

So when we gather pesach night,

We do what we think right.

Maror, we chew,

To feel what they went through.

Chorus

So after years of slavery

They saw no chance of being free.

Their suffering was the only life they knew.

But baby Moses grew up tall,

And said he'd save them all.

He did, and yet,

We swear we won't forget.

That......

Chorus

While the maror is being passed,

We all refill our water glass,

Preparing for the taste that turns us red.

Although maror seems full of minuses,

It sure does clear our sinuses.

But what's to do?

It's hard to be a Jew!!!

Chorus



>>>  >> >------------------------------------

Same time next year        (to the tune of "Makin' Whoopee")


Another Pesach, another year,

The family seder with near and dear...

Our faces shining,

All thoughts of dining

Are put on hold now.

We hear four questions,

The answer given

Recalls the Jews from Egypt driven.

The chrain is bitter, (charoses better!)

Please pass the matzoh.

Why is this evening different

>From all the other nights?

This year the Jews all over

Are free to perform the rites.

A gorgeous dinner--who can deny it--

Won't make us thinner, to hell with diet!

It's such great cooking...

and no one's looking,

So just enjoy it.

Moving along at steady clip

Elijah enters, and takes a sip;

And then the singing with voices ringing

Our laughter mingling.

When singing about Chad Gad Ya.

Watch close or your place you'll lose,

For Echad Mi Yodea:

Which tune shall we use?

We pray next Pesach

We'll all be here.

It's a tradition...

Same time next year...

So fill it up now, the final cup now,

Next year at ____________


>>>  >> >-------------------------------------

The Ballad of the Four Sons       (to the tune of "Clementine")

Said the father to his children,

"At the seder you will dine,

You will eat your fill of matzoh,

You will drink four cups of wine."

Now this father had no daughters,

But his sons they numbered four.

One was wise and one was wicked,

One was simple and a bore.

And the fourth was sweet and winsome,

he was young and he was small.

While his brothers asked the questions

he could scarcely speak at all.

Said the wise one to his father

"Would you please explain the laws?

Of the customs of the seder

Will you please explain the cause?"

And the father proudly answered,

"As our fathers ate in speed,

Ate the paschal lambe 'ere midnight

And from slavery were freed."

So we follow their example

And 'ere midnight must complete

All the seder and we should not

After 12 remain to eat.

Then did sneer the son so wicked

"What does all this mean to you?"

And the father's voice was bitter

As his grief and anger grew.

"If you yourself don't consider

As son of Isreal,

Then for you this has no meaning

You could be a slave as well."

Then the simple son said simply

"What is this," and quietly

The good father told his offspring

"We were freed from slavery."

But the youngest son was silent

For he could not ask at all.

His bright eyes were bright with wonder

As his father told him all.

My dear children, heed the lesson and remember evermore

What the father told his children

Told his sons that numbered four.



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