[HANASHIR:4550] Dreidle, dreidle parodies and others - a Chanukah gift

[Rachel Gurevitz <R.Gurevitz...>]

Hi there,

It seems that my email last week frightened people off from mailing in
their chanukah parodies.  Oops - sorry, Janis, that really wasn't my
intention.  I was just hoping that we might achieve the same end with
one email.  But we haven't heard from Joanna yet, so I've been doing
some detective work and have rediscovered the email that I was talking
about myself.  I really didn't think I had it - I saved some hanashir
emails at my last university and still have the disks, but I didn't
think I'd be able to read them with my current software.  But I was
wrong.  So following this, I've pasted in the text of 2 emails from the
past 2 years.  One was from  Jeff Klepper - a whole load of chanukah
songs to well-known songs of the 50s and 60s.  Following that is the
list of dreidle, dreidle parodies that Joanna compiled for us after we'd
all mailed our individual ones.

A happy Chanukah to all (peace, goodwill, apologies if I pissed anyone
off...),

Rachel

CHANUKAH 1950's PARODIES

HOW MANY CHANUKAH LIGHTS ARE STILL LEFT TO GO? (Words By Rabbi David
Nelson)

Each time we light a candle, it always burns so bright
And that is how we know, it's Chanukah tonight
Each night I ask the candles in a row:
How many Chanukah lights are still left to go?

It started long ago, with Judah Maccabee
He asked Antiocus to let the Jews be free
Each night I ask the candles in a row:
How many Chanukah lights are still left to go?

        I cried a tear when the onions were sliced
        But oh those crispy latkas tasted oh so very nice

In the end the Maccabees put up a winning fight
We recall their bravery when we see the burning lights
Each night I ask the candles in a row:
How many Chanukah lights are still left to go?

YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A DREIDLE (Words By Rabbi David Nelson)

You ain't nothin' but a dreidle spinnin' all the time (2)
You ain't never spun a dreidle till you've spun one of mine

You got four Hebrew letters - nun gimel hey shin (2)
So be a good dreidle and always let me win

They said that you was plastic, but that was just a lie (2)
Just give you a twist and watch that dreidle fly!

BEATLE CHANUKAH PARODIES

THEY SPIN ME (words by Michael Lotker and Jeff Klepper)

They spin me yeah, yeah, yeah
They spin me yeah, yeah, yeah
They spin me yeah, yeah, yeah

You say you lost your gelt
Well you had it yesterday
Quick, before it melts
Roll a gimel or a hay

        You know they spin me
        And I really can't get mad
        You know they spin me
        If you lose then I'll be sad

Oh you really shouldn't care
If you lost or if you won
Use nuts or chocolate gelt
You can eat them when you're done!

        You know they spin me
        And I really can't get mad
        You know they spin me
        If you lose then I'll be sad

They spin me yeah, yeah, yeah
They spin me yeah, yeah, yeah
When the spinning stops, believe you me, I'm glad

EIGHT DAYS A YEAR (words by Michael Lotker and Jeff Klepper)

Oo I need your latkas, guess you know it's true
But all I got were chachkes, so that's what I'll give you
Latkas frying - presents buying
It's what we do each winter, eight days a year

We're lighting the menorah, each and every Jew
We're learning from the Torah, the things we have to do
Candles burning - we're all learning
It's what we do each winter, eight days a year

        Eight days a year - we clean out our menorahs
        Eight days a year - we sing of Judah Maccabee

Each night we get presents, and have a lot of fun
Eight days makes much more sense, than only having one
Dreidles spinning - I'll be winning
It's what we do each winter, eight days a year

        Eight days a year - we clean out our menorahs
        Eight days a year - if only they would cancel school!

NO GOOD MAN words by Betty Ross and Jeff Klepper

He's a real No Good man
Came here from a foreign land
Antiochus is his name - he's the King.

Worships gods they have in Greece
Wants the Jews to be a piece
Of his empire in the East he's the King.

        Makes us pray - the Greek way
        Night and day - the Greek way
        Everything - Antiochus says we must do it his way.

Some Jews think this all is fine
Being Greek is no big crime
Even if you happen to be a Jew.

They don't want to make a fuss
Let the Greeks rule over us
But some of us won't stand for what they do.

        Help us now, oh Judah
        We won't bow, no, Judah
        Show us how to fight for the right to pray our own way.

Take your army to the hills
Fight until they've had their fill
And keep it up until they go away.

        No Good Man, get lost now
        You are not the boss now
        No Good Man we're ready to die, the stakes are so high!
        
He's a real No Good man
Came here from a foreign land
Antiochus is his name - he's the King.

LOVELY LATKAS (Words by Jeff Klepper)

Lovely latkas we have made (2)

Lovely latkas we have made, my stomach can't come between us
When Chanukah comes I'll live with Tums all day

I grated too hard, I scraped my hand
We supplied and they demanded
Sitting at the table with a ravenous look
Every night I ate a bunch
Saved a few to have for lunch
But there's nothing like a latka coming out of the pan

Lovely latkas we have made, my doctor can't come between us
When Chanukah comes I'll live with Tums all day

Very next day we made some more
Then neighbors started knocking on the door
Looking sad and hungry so we let 'em all in
Played a game, I nearly won it
Everybody asked me how I'd done it
Spinning in the kitchen with a dreidle or two

Lovely latkas we have made, why are you so appealing
Add sour cream and let me dream of you!

HEY JEWS (Chanukah Version) words by the Baruch family and Jeff Klepper

Hey Jews, you can't refuse
Light one candle, then light another
Remember to have a very good time
With thanks to Judah and his brothers

Hey Jews, don't be afraid
We've been taught to bow down never
How clever to always give it your best
And never rest, till our world is better

        And anytime you're feeling low
        Hey Jews you know
        Our persecutors won't win, cause they're so hateful
        So light a candle - make some noise
        All girls and boys
        Recall and retell the wondrous story (na na na na...)

Hey Jews, let's all be brave
Sing our blessings and thank our heroes
Remember to never hide who you are
Then you can start to make life better (better, better..etc)

Na, na, na, na na na na, na na na na, Hey Jews
HAVE A LITTLE DREIDEL - The New Verses

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of clay,
And when it's dry and ready, then dreidel I shall play!

FOOD AND SUCH
I have a little dreidel, I made it out of bread,
It looked so very yummy, I ate it up instead!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of pasta
It got all tangled in my hair, and now they call me "rasta"

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of gum,
And when I tried to spin it, it stuck to my thumb!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of egg,
I dropped it on the floor, and the yolk spun down my leg!

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of lox
It tastes good on a bagel, but it smells worse than my socks

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of meat
I can't stand to be near it -- it smells just like my feet

I had a little dreydl, I made it out of meat
Forget about the spinning, let's all sit down and eat

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of latkes,
I put it on the mantel, with all my other chatchkas!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of ice
It melted when I spun it, that wasn't very nice!

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of shmaltz
it don't make healthy eatin' but that dreidle sure can waltz

I have a little dreidl, I made it from gefilte fish
My mother served it for Shabbat, but it spun right off my dish!

I had a little dreidl, I made it out of a Reese's peanut butter cup
I never got to play with it, because I ate it up!

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of broccoli,
And when it's dry and ready, I'll feed it to my doggie!

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of rice
It wasn't great for spinning, but it tasted rather nice

I have a little dreidle, I made it from a chip
and when I tried to spin it, it jumped into the dip

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of Jelly beans.
And when I tried to spin it, it blew to smithereens.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of spice,
And when I went to spin it, it smelled really nice.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of pickles,
And when I put it on my hand, it always spins and tickles.

FAMILIAR OBJECTS
I have a little dreidel, I made it out of pencil,
And when I tried to spin it, it made a circle stencil!

I had a little dreydl, I made it from a broom
I think I'll try to talk it into cleaning up my room

I have a little dreidel, it's made out of a shoe,
It smells a little funny, but then what can you do?

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of pearls,
I showed it to my friends, it's the envy of the girls!

I had a little dreydl, I made it from a guitar
And if it's not too heavy, I will put it in my car.

I have a little dreidle, it's made out of guitars,
I put it in a rocket, and it blasted off to Mars!

OTHER MATERIALS
I have a little dreidel, I made it out of glass,
My mom says I can spin it, but only on the grass!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of fur,
It was warm and cuddly, and the spinning made it purr!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of plastic
I put a gimel on every side, that dreidel is fantastic!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of soap
I carved a shin on every side, why am I such a dope?

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of glue
The baby tried to spin it, and now she's spinning too!

I have a little dreidel, I made it from cement
And now our lovely hardwood floor has a nasty dent

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of light,
But for some strange reason, it only works at night.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of cloth,
I put it in the closet, it got eaten by a moth!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of bubbles,
But whenever I spin it, I can only see in doubles.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of leather,
And when I throw it in the air, it grows a little feather.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of wood,
I set it on fire, then it didn't spin so good.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of wood,
My little brother ate it, he thought it tasted good.

I have a little dreidel, I made it from a pole,
And when I went to spin it, it dug a real deep hole.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of a road.
And when I tried to spin it, it smashed a little toad.

I have a little dreidel, I spun it on a well,
And what it landed on, I just couldn't tell.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of plutonium,
And when it got to China, it caused a pandemonium.

METALS
I have a little dreidl, I made it out of metal
And if it doesn't spin at all, I'll use it for a kettle!

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of brass
I brought it in to Sunday school and showed it to my class

Yesh li sevivon katan, asui mizahav
Hu matana me-abba, bo, n'sachek achshav

NATURAL PHENOMENA
I have a little dreidel, I made it out of snow
I baked it in the oven, hey, where'd my dreidel go?

I have a little dreidel, I carved it from a log
And when I threw it on the floor it nearly killed the dog

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of fire,
I tried to tell my mommy, she thought I was a liar!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of ashes,
And when I go to spin it, it always smashes.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of schmutz,
When I went to spin it, it turned into a kibbutz.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of dirt,
And when I tried to spin it, I got a dirty shirt!

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of straw,
And when I went to spin it, it broke the speeding law.

I have a little dreidel, I made if from a stone,
A little doggie ate it, he thought it was a bone.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of string,
And when I went to spin it, it began to sing.

I had a little dreidel, I made it from a rock.
But when I tried to spin it, it turned into a block.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of hair.
When I tried to spin it, it was just barely there.

I had a little dreidel, I made it out of dust.
But when I tried to spin it, it blew away with a gust.

I have a little dreidel, I made it out of mud.
And when I tried to spin it, it went down with a thud.

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of mud
And when I tried to spin it, I found it was a dud

I had a little dreidle, I made it out of sand,
But when I went to spin it, it crumbled in my hand.

I had a little dreydl, I made it from a bush
But, when I tried to lift it, it knocked me on my tush

I had a little dreidle, I made it out of air,
but when I went to spin it, it wasn't even there!

TECHNOLOGY
I have a little dreidl, I made it on my pc
It's really fun to spin it in virtual reality.

I made a little dreidle in virtual reality.
If you wear the right headgear, it's there for you to see.

CATEGORIZING THE UNCATEGORIZABLE:
FOREIGN, PSYCHOLOGICAL, AND GOYISCHE DREIDELS
I had a little Driedle, it came from the UK.
It wrote a little poem, and then it shied away.

I had a little dreidel, I made it out of clay,
Said a Kabbalistic blessing, and it got up and walked away.

I have a little dreidle, I made it in my mind,
my imaginary dreidle is very hard to find.

I have a little dreydle, I made it for my shiksa
She heard it was for spinning, so she put it in the mixer

ADULTS-ONLY VERSES (Not recommended for Hebrew school use!)
I have a little dreidel, I made it out of gin
That dreidel wouldn't turn, but the room began to spin

I have a little dreidle, I made it out of pot
and when it started spinning, I just sat and stared at it a lot

I had a little dreidle, I made it out of latke.
I left it on the shelf and it turned into vodka.

I have a little dreidle, it's down here in my pants
And when I spin it properly, you should see my dreidle dance

-Compiled and updated December 1998 by Joanna Selznick Dulkin



Dr. Rachel Gurevitz
Dept. of Geography
Arts E418,School of Social Sciences
University of Sussex,
Falmer, Brighton.


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