[HANASHIR:6228] three poems

[Roslyn Schwartz <rs4...>]

Rick posted a poem that was not (and was) a love poem.  For the past
five days, I've been writing love poetry and letters.  More than thirty
of them.  My thoughts will not stop.

I've never written love poetry before.  Sharing them is VERY VERY
DANGEROUS for me.  But I'm going to do it anyway.

People at HN kept saying: ask for what you want.  So:  if my words touch
you, please write me privately and let me know.  Otherwise I feel like I
have thrown a stone into a lake and watched it sink without a ripple.

- Ros

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I'm having the opposite of a nervous breakdown.  A nervous
put-together-up?  I can't fall asleep at night, I wake up early in the
morning, I am simultaneously exhausted and wired.  I have no appetite, I
miss meals without noticing, I can't force myself to eat even though I
know I should.  I can't concentrate on my work, I can't stay put and
focus, my mind keeps turning over thoughts and thoughts and thoughts. 
People say things and have to repeat them because they don't go in.  Yet
I am seeing with inordinate clarity, perceiving the depths beneath
reality.  The silly stupid things people do around me don't matter,
don't affect me.  I am  open to people I have been afraid of, asking
questions I have never asked, seeing and feeling with new wisdom.  I
have been hurt and it doesn't matter;  sadness and joy are one and the
same.  I am taking risks that I never previously would have dared to
take.  


This inner fire that is burning.


Perhaps I am in love.

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(how I feel)



a compressed spring
a stretched elastic
too much coffee
not enough air 


a vibrating guitar string
a resonating flute
a drum's heartbeat
 

anxious

impatient

longing



when can I see you again

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No.  I'm not wrong.


I know what I saw before
              felt during
              heard afterward


I'm not wrong.





I walked across an open field
     and was struck by lightning.


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